Contentment is a beautiful, solid, long-lasting feeling. It is an internal attitude that is rooted in acceptance, mindfulness and gratitude, possibly the most important attitude to cultivate! When we are content, we are grounded in the now, we enjoy what we HAVE, and we enjoy what we ARE. We have the feeling that we are enough, we have enough. We feel complete, whole. How wonderful it is to feel this way !!
Contentment is a sense of sufficiency; a pleasant feeling not only about all we have but also a harmonious acceptance of what we do not yet have but desire. It allows us to feel calm and energetic, enjoying inner peace & joy, focusing our energies on productivity and positivity.
The Essence of Contentment
In Samskrit, the ancient language of India, the words trupti, santrupti, thosha, santosha, thushta, santhushta, paripoornatha, manah prasadah all mean (or are connected to) the word contentment. The prefix saṃ (सं, सम्) in these words is a prefix that denotes ‘all, complete, whole, entire’ added to the root words to imply acceptance of ‘what is and what is not, what we have and what we don’t have’ fully, completely, in its entirety, wholly.
It means that we enjoy what we have now, and are at peace with what we don’t have as well, and that is the Essence of Contentment.
Most of us strive for happiness not contentment! But we need to remember that happiness and contentment are complementary emotions and are both needed for emotional well-being in life. In fact contentment has a higher place in many cultures than happiness! Happiness is short-lived and could be dependent on external fulfillment while contentment is more long-lasting, internal and something we need to learn to feel!
We need to ‘learn’ to be content!
We have to learn to be content because discontentment and dissatisfaction are feelings that come easily while being content is a CHOICE we have to make! Contentment comes not by acquiring more material possessions but by choosing to focus on and rejoice in what we have. Feeling content requires us to be aware of our feelings, be present in the now, and needs a bit of practise!
The experience of contentment
Think of that delicious meal you had… when you ate just the right quantity, not too much, yet enjoyed it greatly. The feeling of satiety at the good meal, the lightness and the satisfaction afterward are what made it memorable! You wondered if you should eat a bit more, but said no……because you felt……yes, contented :).
We cherish that feeling of satisfaction because it is a long-lasting, gentle feeling unlike the spike or burst of emotion that comes with a victory, a win or an achievement!
Gratitude is the foundation of contentment.
While there’s no formula to create contentment, gratitude is the first step. When we remember all that we have and feel blessed and grateful for all the joys in our world, it is the beginning of contentment!
The next steps are – being mindful and accepting.
When we are mindful, we are aware of our thoughts and our surroundings. We are deeply aware of our breath and this itself is so relaxing, soothing. In such moments we feel complete and calm. We do not feel needy or dissatisfied. When we stop being needy, we focus on what we already have in positive ways.
When we are accepting of our feelings, emotions and our own selves with all the positives and negatives, we feel at peace. There are instances when we feel dissatisfied with an experience. We might be disappointed at a dish or the service at a restaurant. Yes, we can definitely insist that we receive only the best. However, to feel contentment, we must overlook and ignore some small things, be willing to see the bigger picture, and not get stuck with petty niggles. Being a bit less critical of ourselves, our work, and of others will help.
Does being content mean we need to settle for less? Should we discard ambition?
Definitely not. In fact when we put in our best effort while being in an active state of improvement, whatever is the result we get, we can accept it joyfully. And therein lies the difference between contentment and complacency !
Ambition (or desire for the best) and Contentment are not mutually exclusive. On the other hand, a combination of the two is the highest form of action – Selfless Action – as defined by Shri Krishna in the Bhagavad Gita. He, who was definitely ambitious and encouraged action gives us this powerful advise to accept the outcome, whatever it may be, as the reward.
Discontentment
Discontentment is the opposite feeling – a sense of insufficiency, a lack of satisfaction with one’s possessions, status or situation. It could be a sense of always wanting more, perhaps because what we already have is not valued enough. It is associated with restlessness and no ease of mind. Comparing oneself and one’s possessions with those of others could lead to discontent. This inevitably leads to despair because there is no end to comparing !
Of course it is not wrong to want more or have higher goals but this should not stop one from peacefully enjoying what one already has in the present. Constant dissatisfaction and a feeling of insufficiency lead to a sense of grievance. In this state how can there be peace of mind !?
Is discontent all bad?!
Surprisingly, the answer seems to be No. Some discontent is essential and is the driving force for advancements in any field. Discontent is a major motivator to re-purpose one’s life. When discontentment sets in, if the future action plan is a positive one leading to greater improvements, it could be of great benefit to self and humanity. Thus, we need some discontent in our minds too ! However, a state of contentment can still be used as a ‘parking’ state until the goals are achieved.
I quote from Sage Patanjali’s YOGA SUTRAS (2.42) which puts across the connection between contentment and happiness –
संतोषादनुत्तमसुखलाभः ॥ २.४२ ॥
From contentment is gained, incomparably the best, supreme happiness.
Simply put, it is from what we perceive as having, ie, from our state of contentment, that we derive happiness, not from what we do not have !
Do let me know what makes you contented and how you tackle feelings of dissatisfaction in your lives !
